[141+] Best Funny Captions For Instagram –{2020}

Best Funny Instagram Captions

• Forget love, I’d rather fall in chocolate.

• I Live And I Learn But I Wait My Turn. I’m Always On The Run, Got Weight To Burn.

• They say don’t try this at home…so I went to my friends home!

• Eat, sleep, click, repeat.

• Lost in the world that doesn’t exist.

• I`m jealous of my parents, I’ll never have a kid as cool as theirs.

• I am not fat, I am just… easier to see.

• I know I’m lucky that I’m so cute.

• If there would be an award for being lazy, I would send someone to pick it up for me.

• The moment when she says you’re cute.

• People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.

• Born free, taxed to death.

• You laugh. I laugh. You cry. I cry. You jump off a really tall cliff. I yell, “Do a flip!”

• When nothing goes right, go left instead!

• Don’t give up on your dreams. keep sleeping.

• Friends knock on the door, best friends walk into your house and start eating.

• Boys will be boys as long as there are no girls in the picture.

• Best friends-Ready to die for each other, but will fight to the death over the last slice of pizza.

• Oh, darling! Go buy a personality.

• Normal is boring.

• I don’t always surf the internet, but when I do, eyebrows!

• Do you actually have friends? Ans: Yeah, bro, all 10 seasons on DVD.

• Friends buy you lunch. Best friends eat your lunch.

• Friday is my second favorite F word.

• Best friends. Because anyone else heard our conversations we’d end up in the mental hospital.

• Can I take your picture?? I love to collect pictures of natural disasters.

• I haven’t done this in a while so excuse me.

• I’m a smart person, I just do stupid things.

• How do people write an autobiography? I can barely remember what I had for lunch yesterday.

• 7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.

• Remember when you were better than me ?.. Ans: ya neither do I.

• If you are going to speak bad things about me on my back, come to me. I’ll tell you more.

• Nothing is illegal until you get caught.

• I’m your worst nightmare.

• Aspire to Inspire before you Expire.

New Funny Instagram Captions For Friends

• If you love something, let it go. If it comes back, it was meant to be. If it does not, hunt it down & kill it.

• You made me laugh so hard. Tears ran down my legs.

• I make the moves up as I go.

• I think you are lacking vitamin me!

• Dear Lord, there is a bug in your software… it’s called Monday, please fix it.

• There may be no excuse for laziness, but I’m still looking. So we meet again.

• What if I told you, you can eat without posting it on Instagram.

• There are 16-year-olds competing at Olympics and I still push on pull doors.

• I am on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it.

• Onions make me sad. A lot of people don’t realize that.

• Silence is the best answer to all questions and Smile is the best reaction in all situations. Unfortunately, both never help in VIVA & INTERVIEW.

• I know you are a sensitive person but no worry I am Sensodyne to your sensitivity.

• We tried to be normal once. Worst two minutes of our lives!

• You make my heart skip a beat.

• Not all the best moments are created with the one you love, some are created with true friends, a blissful beach, and some beer for sure!

• All you need is love, and investors. All you need is love and investors.

• Every tall girl needs a short best friend.

• When you fall I will be ready to catch you- with love, floor.

• You know you’re ugly when it comes to a group picture and they hand you the camera.

• I need a six-month holiday, twice a year.

• Make love, not war. Hell, do both. Get married.

• I’ll never try to fit in. I was born to STAND OUT.

• May your coffee be hot and your eyeliner even.

• An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but if doctor is cute, forget the fruit.

• I am not lazy, I am just on my energy saving mode.

Funny Selfie Captions/ Funny Captions For Friends

• God is really creative, I mean just look at me.

• Only dead fish go with the flow.

• Can I take your picture? I love to collect pictures of natural disasters.

• Roses are red, violets are blue, Oh my friend you to a zoo.

• I don’t know what’s tighter, our jeans or our friendship.

• No one will ever be as entertained by us as us.

• It’s okay to be a glow stick; sometimes we need to break before we shine.

• Can Bob the Builder fix my bad attitude?

• If I ever let my head down, it will be just to admire my shoes.

• God is really creative, I mean just look at me.

• I’m so happy to have you in my life. Please don’t ever leave.

• Friendship is, being equally annoying.

• I put my phone in airplane mode, but it’s not flying!

• It’s funny how people judge other’s mistakes while they also do the same thing.

• Brains are awesome. I wish everybody had one.

• I look at people sometimes and think …………. Really?? That’s the sperm that won.

• The first five days after the weekend are always the toughest.

• Look behind you see any eager faces, waiting for your next post? I thought not.

• I just saw the smartest person when I was in front of the mirror.

• Every tall girl needs a short best friend.

• Eat right, stay fit, die anyway.

• Let’s just stay friends = never talk again.

• I hope you dance like no one’s watching because they’re not—they’re taking selfies.

• We’ll be the old ladies causing trouble in the nursing home.

• The language of friendship is not words but meanings.

• I hope we are good friends until we die, then I hope we can stay ghost friends, walk through walls and scare people.

• I’m usually charming, nice, and well mannered, OK for those who really know me you can laugh now.

• With great girlfriend comes great expenses.

• Drinking every night because we drink to my accomplishments

New Funny Couple Captions & Funny Food Captions-2020

• Newton’s law of love: Love can neither be created nor be destroyed. Only it can transfer from one girlfriend to another with some loss of money.

• When nothing goes right, go left instead!

• I’m actually not funny, I am just mean and people think I’m funny!

• I am not feeling lazy actually, I am just incredibly motivated to do nothing.

• I am not lazy, I am just on my energy saving mode.

• Warning – You might fall in love with me.

• Without me, it is just Aweso…………..

• Finding friends with the same mental disorder is priceless.

• People are like Oreos. The good stuff is on the inside.

• Cousins are created so that our Parents can compare marks.

• Winner winner tasteless dinner.

• You marry so that you can know each other and the process lasts for infinity.

• Brains are awesome. I wish everybody had one.

• Eat right, stay fit, die anyway.

• Life gave you lemons? Make lemonade then.

• I’m actually not funny, I am just mean and people think I’m funny!

• An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but if the doctor is cute, forget the fruit.

• I hate when I am about to hug someone really sexy and my face hits the mirror.

• I love my six-pack so much, I protect it with a layer of fat.

• I’m as useful as the pause break button on the keyboard.

• People are people but my fellows are really fellows.

• Dear Lord… please give me some patience NOW…NOW…

• Who cares, I’m awesome.

• I’m different, fuck your opinion.

New Funny Captions For Instagram

• Look dope chic, spice and so nice.

• I smile because I have no idea what’s going on.

• I can kill to get a noble peace price.

• If life gives you lemons, just add vodka.

• As soon as I saw you, I knew an adventure is going to happen.

• Please GOD if you can’t make me slim, make my friends fat.

• Nobody can handle me even if I got instructions printed on me.

• Love may be blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.

• Dear MATH, stop asking to find your X, she’s not coming back.

• I like you because you are weird too!

• I`m jealous of my parents, I’ll never have a kid as cool as theirs.

• I was a really good kid, but then i met my best friend.

• My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.

• The best way to look younger, hang out with older people.

• Do you know what’d look good on you? Me.

• A friend in need of a friend to be avoided.

• My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch … I call it lunch.

• Friends come and go, like the waves of the ocean…………… But the true ones stay, like an octopus on your face.

• I’m not weird, I’m a limited edition.

• On a scale of 1 to 10, I’m a 15.

• I want to be like a caterpillar. Eat a lot. Sleep for a while. Wake up beautiful.

• I miss you like an idiot misses the point.

• I didn’t choose the thug life, the thug life chose me.